Twin Flames: Who Is “Running”? Your Soul or Your Small Self?
Question: “Have you felt like running again when a twin flame harmonizes with you?”
Hey, I recently came across a question on Quora that I thought was so important I had to answer it here for you. Someone asked: Why do I feel like running when things start to harmonize with my Twin Flame? And honestly, it’s such a powerful question because it cuts right to the heart of the Twin Flame journey—a journey that challenges everything we think we know about love, connection, and self-identity.
To answer this, we must first unpack what it means to “harmonize” in a Twin Flame connection and why the instinct to run isn’t what it seems.
The Truth About Twin Flame “Harmony”
At its core, “harmony” in the Twin Flame journey is a state of being - or energetic alignment with your OWN SOUL ENERGY. It’s not about external circumstances—it’s about an inner state of being where you’ve released fear-based energy and stepped into alignment with your soul’s truth. Harmony is a reflection of your higher self, the part of you that is already in union with your Twin Flame at a soul level.
When you are truly in harmony, there is nothing to fear and, therefore, nothing to run from. But here’s the catch: most of us don’t live fully in that harmonious state. Instead, we oscillate between moments of soul alignment and moments where fear, doubt, and separation consciousness take over. This oscillation is what creates the illusion of “running.”
Who Is Running? Your Soul or Your Small Self?
To understand why you feel like running, it’s crucial to identify who within you is having this reaction. The truth is:
Your soul-aligned self is the energy of harmony, love, and oneness. This part of you recognizes that your Twin Flame is you—there is no separation. There is no reason to run because you are already whole.
Your small self (or ego) is the one experiencing fear and separation. This is the part of you rooted in limiting beliefs, unresolved wounds, and conditioned patterns. When the small self perceives the intensity of the Twin Flame connection, it often reacts by trying to “protect” you through avoidance or retreat.
In essence, you’re not running from your Twin Flame—you’re running from yourself. Specifically, you’re running from the parts of you that feel unworthy, unsafe, or overwhelmed by the deep transformation this journey demands.
Why the Cycle of Running and Chasing Persists
The Twin Flame dynamic often gets caught in a cycle of running and chasing, which can feel exhausting and confusing. But here’s the key: this cycle is not about the other person. It’s about your own inner state of being.
When you’re in a state of separation consciousness, you emit fear-based energy. This energy manifests as:
Running: Avoiding the connection because it feels too intense or mirrors aspects of yourself you’re not ready to face.
Chasing: Clinging to the connection out of fear of losing it, trying to force external union before achieving internal alignment.
Both running and chasing stem from the same root issue: a lack of inner balance. The only way to stop the cycle is to shift your energy—to move out of separation and into alignment with your soul.
How to Stop Running and Start Aligning
If you’re ready to break free from the running-chasing dynamic, the first step is to take full responsibility for your energy. Remember, you are your Twin Flame, and your outer experience is a reflection of your inner state. Here’s how to begin:
1. Recognize the Illusion of Separation
Understand that the urge to run is not coming from your soul. It’s a reaction of the small self, rooted in fear and a false sense of separation. The more you anchor into the truth that you and your Twin Flame are one at the soul level, the less power this fear will have over you.
2. Heal Your Inner Wounds
The Twin Flame journey is ultimately about inner healing and self-mastery. Use this experience as an opportunity to address the fears, beliefs, and traumas that are keeping you in a state of separation. Practices like inner child healing, shadow work, and energy clearing can be incredibly transformative.
3. Shift from Fear to Love
Fear and love cannot coexist. When you find yourself wanting to run, ask: What am I afraid of? Then consciously choose to shift into a state of love by affirming your worthiness, safety, and oneness with your soul.
4. Align with Your Soul’s Truth
True harmony comes from living in alignment with your soul. This means letting go of attachments, expectations, and conditions placed on the Twin Flame connection. Focus on your own growth, joy, and purpose. As you align with your higher self, you naturally magnetize your Twin Flame into alignment as well.
Ready to Transform?: The Choice to Stop Running
Ultimately, the decision to stop running is yours. It’s about making a conscious choice to step out of the small self and into the energy of your soul. When you stop running from yourself, you create the space for true harmony and union to unfold.
This doesn’t mean the journey will always be easy—but it does mean that you have the power to transform it. By taking responsibility for your energy, healing your wounds, and aligning with your soul, you can transcend the cycle of separation and step into the profound love and oneness that the Twin Flame connection offers.
Union Is The Next Step on Your Journey
If you’re feeling stuck in the running-chasing dynamic or struggling to find alignment, I invite you to explore my FREE Masterclass: 12 Myths and Mistakes Keeping You in Twin Flame Separation. In this masterclass, you’ll learn:
The #1 myth that keeps Twin Flames in separation.
How fear-based energy is blocking your union and how to shift it.
Practical steps to align with your soul and magnetize your Twin Flame back into your life.
Click here to access the free masterclass and take the first step toward transforming your Twin Flame journey.
Remember: harmony begins within. When you align with your soul, everything else falls into place.
If you’re ready to explore this process more deeply and align with your soul’s highest potential, consider joining my Twin Flame Alchemy Mastermind or exploring one of my free mini-courses. Remember, the journey is not about waiting for your Twin Flame’s return; it’s about returning to yourself. When you do, everything else naturally falls into place
Remember, your Twin Flame is your soul. Union isn’t about waiting for them to change; it’s about becoming the highest version of yourself. Let’s take this journey together.
Click [here] to sign up for the FREE MASTERCLASS and take the first step toward union.
You’ve got this, and I’m here to guide you every step of the way.
With love and tough honesty,
Mary, The Twin Flame Alchemist
One of the most common and confusing debates in the Twin Flame journey is whether your soul actually wants you to be with your Twin Flame in the 3D or not. Some teachings claim that your soul doesn’t care if you’re with your Twin Flame. Read on to find out what your soul really wants…